Long Time No See

It has been a long time since I had last written but yes I'm back, or at least most of me is. You see I've been a bit busy as of late with school and such and so I am much too tired to think of writting. My moods haven't changed much, I still have the dark feeling and loneliness inside of me. I suppose there is no possible way to rid myself of this in anyway but as you all should know by know that I have grown accustomed with it, and so it has become a part of me. But it does often get in the way of happiness although I do quite fear being too happy, because nothing is ever perfect now is it? Yes I do have fears as does anyone else but there is nothing I am afraid of more than the feeling of true love. I guess it is mostly because I've seen too many people hurt by it and I already have a heart thats not completely perfect, and am too afraid to fall in love because of it. But away from this awful subject of love in which I have promised no more of, I have recently realized how lustful I have become with age. Yes lust, not love but lust I have become worse than I was when I was younger. I suppose it's because of the fact that I am almost a woman now. Sort of like an animal when it comes of age or something of that sort but another thing that I am glad that comes with it is the ability to control the urge. A bit strange isin't it? Well now I must leave you until next I write and hope it will not be as long as last.

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